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The first week of October is nationally recognized as Mental Illness Awareness week. The goal of this week is to bring better understanding, awareness, and acceptance about the existence of mental illness in the American population.

While, I appreciate any effort made on a national scale to reduce the stigma attached to mental disorders, I struggle with the words chosen; “metal illness.” Could it be that a stigma exists solely because the word “illness” is used?

I cannot say for sure, but I do know that at The Lighthouse, my colleagues and I prefer and use the terms mental and emotional health, that is we work at framing treatment as a proactive approach towards mental and emotional health. After all, the goal of any mental disorder treatment is to reduce symptoms and improve functionality, thus guiding you in the direction of health. As a Wellness Center, we further distinguish ourselves from other mental health practices in the area by providing tools from both eastern and western philosophies that help people holistically improve their mental health and emotional wellness.

During this Mental Illness Awareness week, I want to take a moment to remind you that we offer a complimentary first session at The Lighthouse. So if you know someone who may be struggling with mental health issues, please let them know about the benefits of the way we practice and encourage them to come see for themselves.

Additionally, if you yourself have recently stopped your treatment due to financial constraints, I want to extend an invitation for you to return and work with our new Intern, Rachael Matrejek, who is available to help clients unable to afford treatment.

Lastly, try to take a moment this week and think about what you or your loved ones do to either stigmatize or accept the mental health issues of others and be aware of what impact you might have in helping or hurting our cause. I encourage you all to move in the direction of acceptance, proactivity and health.

Regards,
Joanna Tufexis, MA

One man’s struggle may be able to put a public face on and hopefully increased understanding and recognition of borderline personality disorder.

We have no choice of what color we’re born or who our parents are or whether we’re rich or poor. What we do have is some choice over what we make of our lives once we’re here. – Mildred Taylor

Peanut Butter Fingers author and Fremd High School Graduate, Julie Fagan, recently shared this “Handbook to Life” on her blog.  I immediately knew I wanted to share it with all of you and she was gracious enough to allow me to do so.

Handbook to Life

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy.
5. Make time to pray.
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minute walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

11. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts over things you cannot control. Instead, invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t overdo. Keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. Be grateful for what you have been given.
18. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
20. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
21. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away (like algebra class) but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
22. Smile and laugh more.
23. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

24. Call your family often.
25. Each day give something good to others.
26. Forgive.
27. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
28. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

31. Do the right thing!
32. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
33. God heals everything.
34. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
35. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
36. The best is yet to come.
37. When you awake alive in the morning, thank God for it.
38. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Number 29 is special to me because it is a quote I use when I work with clients struggling with self-esteem issues; “What other people think of you is none of your business.”

Which guideline(s) resonate with you?

“Form the intention to work on the problem, and then trust the part of you to work on it.”  You may be thinking that this came from the sequel to The Secret which describes how to use the Law of Attraction – set your intention then trust it will occur.  But no, this was from research conducted by the Kellogg School of Management (http://insight.kellogg.northwestern.edu/index.php/Kellogg/article/too_conscious_to_decide).

The article outlines research conducted on choosing.  My takeaways from the research were: 1) simple decisions were better made cognitively, more complex decisions were better made going with one’s gut, 2) decisions were better made not when one concentrated on what to do, but by setting the intention to solve the problem then distracting the conscious mind.  What I heard in this research was proof that our essential selves, our body compasses, our internal source, and/or the god within is a better judge of what is right for us than our conscious mind.

How often do we think and think and think through a problem only to feel that the logical answer is not correct?  How often do we become sad and depressed when the logical, cognitive answer is not the one that makes our heart sing?  How often do we receive flashes of insight on what to do or say?  How often do we just “feel in our gut” what to do?

The article states, “For unconscious thought to work, it needs to be goal directed.  You need to form an intention to work on a problem, and then divert attentions elsewhere.  It’s all about intention and trust.”  Intention and trust are two powerful words.  Intention is very important.  All too often we go throughout life without direction, without goals, without a destination and then we are also disappointed that we do not have the life we desire.  To gain what we desire, we need to put out to the universe what it is that we want.  What is our intention?  What do we want to solve, gain, or lose?  By setting an intention, we are placing our order with the universe.

Intention is easy we just need to remember to do it.  Trust is hard.  Trust means letting go of control and getting out of the driver’s seat.  Trust means accepting when things come to us and how they come.  Trust means more than believing but knowing that what we asked for we will receive.  Trust means distracting the mind and then sitting silently with one’s self and allowing the answer to come.  And trust means accepting the answer that comes to us through means other than through logic.

Has there been a time that you set an intention and trusted that it would come true?  Was there a time when you went with your gut and things turned out better than you could have imagined had you followed the logical course?  Share with us your experiences with intuition, intention, and trust.